A Rhode Island Apology

The following is the narrative which emerged from the Open Re/Search project In Memory Of... which was the subject of the previous post. The narrative developed along with the graphic form. Both informed each other throughout the process of design. 

A relationship lost. A brother has gone, and is nowhere to be found. The memory of this relationship is on a very thin line where if crossed, it will no longer be. Does the memory of something long gone need to be kept? Is it better to let the memory fade away?

Do the words count in keeping the memory alive? The memory of love lost. The words count. YES. They are the measurement of the love. The words say sunny day, but they mean it is cold.

Why was the relationship lost at all? Who made it go away? In surviving in an off center world one looks for a center. Small emphasis on a name, is how it appears to others but the name of the lost one can become the center for the one left behind.

Then there is a mother who spent time writing to people, and not to things. No space for words, only feelings. Realizing while they were written, the fortunate memory of space seeped into the mother's mind. Writing the name with care, the mother is allowed to slowly forget.

But allow us to the remember the name the mother spent time writing. Maybe it was the brother. There was a backward moment in time where he was there and then gone. He is fading through the lines and the tangles.

Perhaps a gentle force moved through her when she left her memory on the page. Remembering optimism with mixed emotions. Writing she felt slightly off, so it was difficult to see the larger picture. Where was the time when he was near to her? Where had he gone? What can be done to remember? Should she remember? He is slipping through.

It becomes a mystery. Why is he not fortunate enough to be forgotten? A sweet memory is jokingly named. The mother writes it down. Funny she thinks, a note to a person gone from her. Writing not to the public but to him. Life, me, you, because he is the remembered moment, needing to be left behind.

It was part of a person... this relationship. This moment of explanation is written as a secret. The numbers of them to remember. What is memory for? Above all it could be a whisper. She is losing a grip on something so deep she cannot find it. There are periods of doubt and mixed emotions. This is a sad memory, the relationship lost. She is losing her grip. A secret moment of explanation, to herself. An apology of sorts. She is not surviving without him. The symbol of optimism is near, although she feels another sad memory approaching.

Why do they need to know? It is a stage name for the relationship. The Rhode Island Apology. She needs to know providence. She needs direction with wise benevolence. Providence lets her feel something greater. Not the place, the feeling. Perhaps she does not deserve providence, because she is letting him go... perhaps she deserves providence because she is letting him go. She needs to leave an apology.

She is slanted and hurried, she is in a worried state of mind. This is not meant to be a project of attention. Why does she need to be worried. She is meant to worry because there is doubt. Hurried. Slanted. She shouts: "Where is he?" "What do I do?"

She is not surviving without him. Periods of something missing. What did he say to make her leave? Did she pass away? He is made important by passing... through this period of Apology. Let it fall. Close it. Light a candle. Walk away.